Technical Question....................

[fuel miser]

Sunday last, we drove over to Southend-on-Sea to have a look at the classic car show which takes place along the seafront every year. My opinion is that whilst you cannot beat modern cars for their reliability, comfort and safety, I just love looking at old Triumph, Riley, Humber, Mg, Austin Healey, Vanden Plas, Jensen and Ford (Anglia/Consul/Cortina/Zephyr/Zodiac) cars from a bygone age. A fabulous selection was on show, with cars from the turn of the century, right through to the seventies. I can almost get high on the smell of them inside, the leather, wood, carpets and glues they used back then, just have a totally different smell to what modern cars are made of. I also admire the guys with the bottle to put their money into them and run them, either they're committed enthusiasts or just totally mad, many cars before the 70's required routine servicing every 3000 miles, with numerous grease points which had to be attended to, and they frequently left you stranded (we passed two being recovered by the RAC on the A127 as we drove there!).

Anyway, we had a wonderful couple of hours admiring the display, along with many hundreds of others who were also there, and obviously parking space in Southend last Sunday was at a premium. I had parked in a residential road, half a mile from the front, which had a single yellow line running down one side of it, and there were a couple of dozen other vehicles had parked on that line too, so, being a Sunday, I assumed it would be OK. As I approached the street on returning, the first thing parked at the end of the road (on a double yellow!) was a scooter, it's still helmeted rider busily churning out printed tickets from a hand held device, which were deposited in little black and yellow plastic bags bearing the words "Fixed Penalty Notice", which were then neatly tucked under the nearside wiper arm of each vehicle. Mine was one of a whole street of vehicles ticketed.

Now that's the first parking ticket I've had in twelve years, but I still feel a bit narked about it, and it set me thinking as I drove back home. As I drive a Prius, I believe that somewhere in the vicinity of the rear seat, no less than 500 volts is being stored. It must be volatile stuff, because on various parts of the car there are labels saying "Warning! Do Not Touch! Toyota Technicians Only!" So my technical question is this. The wiper arms are obviously constructed of metal, which of course conducts electricity. Now I'm no electrician, but would it be possible, with a few electronic gizmos (a capacitor here, a relay there) to rig a Prius up so that when you press the button to turn the hybrid system off, and you then get out of the car, and press the remote to arm the alarm system, this would automatically divert those 500 volts (which would be sitting there doing nothing) so that they begin throbbing through the wiper arms until you return to the car? Or maybe even a micro switch could be fitted that makes the wiper arm live when it is prised half an inch from the screen?

Just a thought. For purely technical reasons, it may not be possible.

[ian rooke]

Sunday last, we drove over to Southend-on-Sea to have a look at the classic car show which takes place along the seafront every year. My opinion is that whilst you cannot beat modern cars for their reliability, comfort and safety, I just love looking at old Triumph, Riley, Humber, Mg, Austin Healey, Vanden Plas, Jensen and Ford (Anglia/Consul/Cortina/Zephyr/Zodiac) cars from a bygone age. A fabulous selection was on show, with cars from the turn of the century, right through to the seventies. I can almost get high on the smell of them inside, the leather, wood, carpets and glues they used back then, just have a totally different smell to what modern cars are made of. I also admire the guys with the bottle to put their money into them and run them, either they're committed enthusiasts or just totally mad, many cars before the 70's required routine servicing every 3000 miles, with numerous grease points which had to be attended to, and they frequently left you stranded (we passed two being recovered by the RAC on the A127 as we drove there!).

Anyway, we had a wonderful couple of hours admiring the display, along with many hundreds of others who were also there, and obviously parking space in Southend last Sunday was at a premium. I had parked in a residential road, half a mile from the front, which had a single yellow line running down one side of it, and there were a couple of dozen other vehicles had parked on that line too, so, being a Sunday, I assumed it would be OK. As I approached the street on returning, the first thing parked at the end of the road (on a double yellow!) was a scooter, it's still helmeted rider busily churning out printed tickets from a hand held device, which were deposited in little black and yellow plastic bags bearing the words "Fixed Penalty Notice", which were then neatly tucked under the nearside wiper arm of each vehicle. Mine was one of a whole street of vehicles ticketed.

Now that's the first parking ticket I've had in twelve years, but I still feel a bit narked about it, and it set me thinking as I drove back home. As I drive a Prius, I believe that somewhere in the vicinity of the rear seat, no less than 500 volts is being stored. It must be volatile stuff, because on various parts of the car there are labels saying "Warning! Do Not Touch! Toyota Technicians Only!" So my technical question is this. The wiper arms are obviously constructed of metal, which of course conducts electricity. Now I'm no electrician, but would it be possible, with a few electronic gizmos (a capacitor here, a relay there) to rig a Prius up so that when you press the button to turn the hybrid system off, and you then get out of the car, and press the remote to arm the alarm system, this would automatically divert those 500 volts (which would be sitting there doing nothing) so that they begin throbbing through the wiper arms until you return to the car? Or maybe even a micro switch could be fitted that makes the wiper arm live when it is prised half an inch from the screen?

Just a thought. For purely technical reasons, it may not be possible.

I can see you don't like parking wardens, cannot fault you for that, but do you really want to kill one.

[benw123]

There was a story in the papers a few years back of a guy who did something very similar. He wired up the door handles on his car to the Battery with thick cable to get plenty of amps through. A security guard in the car park checked the car was locked one night by pulling at the handle and got electrocuted. The case went to court and he was awarded damages. I like your idea but it ain't worth it!

[reece]

So you want to rig your car so it has 500 volts going through the wipers with the intent and motive to injure and kill someone due to you parking illegally?

[fuel miser]

So you want to rig your car so it has 500 volts going through the wipers with the intent and motive to injure and kill someone due to you parking illegally?

So what is it that motivates you to register on a forum with a 'Mr Bean' avatar, and be so utterly devoid of any sense of humour? What a shame you didn't choke on your profiterole. Car model = "NONE", here's why.........................

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFIOLIDzkcQ

[fuel miser]

There was a story in the papers a few years back of a guy who did something very similar. He wired up the door handles on his car to the battery with thick cable to get plenty of amps through. A security guard in the car park checked the car was locked one night by pulling at the handle and got electrocuted. The case went to court and he was awarded damages. I like your idea but it ain't worth it!

I didn't remember that incident as I posted, but I searched for it and found it................

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/guard...ar-1424714.html

Mind you, I couldn't find out what the result of the trial was, so if the owner didn't actually serve a stretch, then it's still worth considering? Cue the hilarious Mr Bean!.........................

[reece]

I've left the building...

[fuel miser]

I've left the building...

Perchance not quite in time?