Wind in my Willows

[Guest]

Okay, what the hell am I on about now? Well, a few months back our car had a collision with a Pheasant that had no idea about the green cross code. I can't blame bad parenting in this case, as his parents were likely shot by those with loads of money and shotguns.

 So, this stupid bird just wandered out into the path of our car as we were drawing level with a local builders merchants truck, so no avoiding action possible other than braking. The braking did not work out as it was about 8ft ahead of us, and we were likely going around 50 to 60mph. It was a big bird, and some farmer or other bird plucker would likely have loved to get their sweaty mitts on it.

It took out three of our cars teeth* and knocked out the left DRL -*those vertical bits above the bumper in the gap. I did not notice the damage immediately, nor the ongoing issue we have recently had fixed. (Read like a policeman talks) After the RTA we proceeded on our way to our domicile and entered said domicile, oblivious to unsaid damage.

 Okay, enough already!

Over the ensuing days since the pheasant incident, we noticed a rattling sound from under the right rear of the car -sounded like it was there. Having checked and pulled at various flexible items under the right corner of the car, I found nothing loose. It gradually got worse, and I then checked, after an epiphany moment, under the drivers side, discovering the panel -likely for aerodynamic reasons- was loose at the front. So, I called my dealer, Mr T at Shrewsbury, and I was told I could take it in the following day so they could see what was up with it, and check if any parts were required. The large pheasant hit that, and somehow the panel loosened. The bolts at the front were not there when the mechanic at my Mr T dealership looked at it up on the ramp. They kindly replaced the bolts and checked for any more damage, found none thankfully, although he pulled out a grisly bit of flesh from the back of the panel using pliers he said -not fingers.

The moral of this story, 'When driving out in the country, avoid wherever possible errant pheasants wandering around like they were out on the lash Saturday night!' (Or any other night for that matter.)