True Accident Report

[Moffmo]

Australian bricklayer report

This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the

newsletter of the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation

board. This is a true story. Had this guy died, he'd have received a

Darwin Award for sure.......

Dear Sir,

I am writing in response to your request for additional information in

Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the

cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust

the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working

alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my

work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed

later were found to be slightly in excess of 500lbs. Rather than carry

the bricks down by hand I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a

pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth

floor.

Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the

barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied

the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.

You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh

135lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly,

I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless

to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In

the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now

proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explained the

fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed

in section 3 of the accident report form. Slowed only slightly, I

continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right

hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.

Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was

able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience

pain. At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks

hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel.

Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed

approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can

imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building. In

the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This

accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several

lacerations of my legs and lower body. Here my luck began to change

slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to

lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately

only three vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I

lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost

my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay

there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me.

This explains the two broken legs.

I hope this answers your inquiry.

[Jimlad]

lmfao..... is this serious ?

[Chuck04]

haha omg thats fantastic, well not for the guy

[EircamAE86]

Are you sure thats not a spoof, hear a very simular joke a few years ago. Hope it is a joke for the guy in question!!!!!!!

[jaxx]

:D

old but still brilliant!

[Moffmo]

I dunno, i got it off another forum and she sed it was true! hope not

[Chappers]

Great joke/story

[Hou]

I dunno, i got it off another forum and she sed it was true! hope not

now what other forum would that be???? :censor:

[Yarisboy]

it's a joke :)

who in their right mind would try to hold on to and pulley some bricks that weigh approximately 8 times their own weights lol

[Moffmo]

hou, SPWC!!!

[ZeroBlade]

it's a joke :)

who in their right mind would try to hold on to and pulley some bricks that weigh approximately 8 times their own weights lol

i'd prolly be stupid enough to do something like that... <_<

still if its true then &#33;Removed&#33; 'eck

-Z

[Titto]

Guys your missing the point - which is- Did the bricks get to the ground safely?

[Moffmo]

LOL Titto, i think so, they had the soft landing do to a man making them fall slower.

[Demonic Angel]

OUCHIE! :D