Blonde Jokes

[Jamesb4uk]

Post your worst/best

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help

me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it

started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him

in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to

her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be

able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a

nice cup of tea, and then .."

He sighed........"Let's put all the Frosted Flakes back in the

box......."

J

[JappyBeast]

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

[yazburner]

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.

The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.

He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.

Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.

The blonde started laughing.

This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.

This time the blonde laughed even harder.

Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.

The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.

The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"

[Devil-ish]

<<<<<<<<<< little message from a BLOND!!!!!

[1bloke1dog1mr2]

A blonde had just totalled her car in a horrific accident. Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the copper arrived.

"My God!" the copper gasped. "Your car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an elephant. Are you OK madam?"

"Yes, officer, I'm just fine" the blonde chirped.

"Well, how in the world did this happen?" the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car.

"Officer, it was the strangest thing!" the blonde began. I was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this TREE pops up in front of me. So I swerved to the right, and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ANOTHER tree! I served to the right and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ...."

"Uh, madam", the officer said, cutting her off, "There isn't a tree on this road for 30 miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth."

[JappyBeast]

LOL!!!

[Jamesb4uk]

FPMSl - good one....

PS - not meant to upset anyone - just a bit of light hartedness.

J

[bogeysprockett]

Carol and Donna, were doing some carpenter work on a Habitat for

Humanity house.

Carol, who was nailing down house siding, would reach into her nail

pouch, pull out a nail and either toss it over her shoulder or nail it

in

Donna, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, "Why are you

throwing those nails away?" Carol explained, "When I pull a nail out of

my pouch, about half of them have the head on the wrong end and I throw

them away."

Donna got completely upset and yelled , "You moron!

Those nails aren't defective! They're for the other side of the house!"

[Jamesb4uk]

Two blond girls were working for the city public works department. One would dig a hole and the other would follow behind her and fill the hole in.

They worked up one side of the street, then down the other then moved on to the next street, working furiously all day without rest, one girl digging a hole, the other girl filling it in again.

An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing.

So he asked the hole digger, "I'm impressed by the effort you two are putting in to your work, but I don't get it -- why do you dig a hole, only to have your partner follow behind and fill it up again?"

The hole digger wiped her brow and sighed, "Well, I suppose it probably looks odd because we're normally a three-person team.

But today the girl who plants the trees called in sick "

[1bloke1dog1mr2]

<<<<<<<<<< little message from a BLOND!!!!!

Here's one for us girlies then!

Why are blonde jokes so short?

So men can remember them.

[silversurfer]

whats the difference between a blonde and a fridge?????

the fridge dont !Removed! when you take you meat out.

[vmail]

LOL