Thought This Mught B A Bit Of A Laugh

[-baker-]

Guide to doing up your very own VL

1. cut the springs full shick moit, until 11mm off ground

2. full shick interceptors with 2 mags on front wheels majt

3. shick subwoofa ( note: its not loud unless the boot hinges are about to give way )

4. Get some fully fluff assed dice from uncle charlie down at the vic market, he hook you up with some real nishe ones moit

5. install a hair wax holder on the dash for those last minute touch ups before you turn off chapel street

6. buy the lowest seat you can find so all people can see is your Kappa hat poking above the dash

7. fully shick stickers on the side door, showing the sponsors you couldnt afford ( Greddy, HKS etc etc )

8. put 144 on side window and state it does 11's moit

9. install a bottle of gold polish under the dash so you can quickly shine up those "chest- hair line indicators " before stepping out.

10. put a $30 turbo tip from Super-Cheap Auto on your exhaust so people think you can actually afford a real turbo

11. slow down to 2k's approx 20 feet prior to a speed hump, to ensure people think your car is lower than it actually is, and seems like your chassis is detailed

12. stare at people when you drive past as if you're about to fight them, then drive off with as much rpm as possible so they get "scared"

13. when you exit ur car, look at the big scratch on the spoiler as if you didn't do it when you put ur amp on there when ur arms got weak and rub the scratch with ur thumb as if it would come off

14. When you rest your arm on the door, make sure you push outwards so your muscles look bigger.

15. make sure you have a nice 15yo girl in the passenger side who's "like, totally in love with you"

16. never fix ur neons, just constantly jiggle the wires so it goes on

17. make sure ur turbo's bearing are shot so badly that u get 3000rpm of lag and need to pump the clutch to get the shick sound

18. make sure you own a nokia, so you're bro's and hoes can call you and say, hey bro, lets go for a cruise in the Vl turbo Leh!

19. take it to "tint professor" and get to drive the replacement car (excel) and FRASH it to da max

20. never but optimax because ur bro said it's not good for turbos

21. ask a bro for 2 bux for fuel money coz u used ur money up for a new turbo Badge ofr yuour fake vl turbo

22. moving your lisence plates to the side so you can get that extra 3 cubic cm's air intake..

23. when you change the steering wheel moit, make sure you use the good boss kit so your fringes dont get stuck in the column

24. write in ur calender that u'll need a new clutch every two months because you can't drive manual

25. have a folder in your glove box to store all the canaries you cop every saturday night at chapel st coz ur seat is so low

26. ask the copper to stick ur canarie on an angle in the perfect place on ur window so the most people will see it at "chapz"

27. keep a syphon tube in the boot incase you need to make a quick refill majt

28. nod ur head to other "tilted hat people" as if you know them... they'll nod back if they are sick

29. get your break lights tinted so they are only just visible at night.

30. make sure u are sponsored by a Car Towing company, proving you are a real vl muzza on the burnout run saturday nights

31. dont use breaks.. manual shift the auto like a sick !Removed!..

32. Clean your lowerd seats before leaving chapel so mumma knows you didnt eat a souvlaki after her dinner.

33. State you got a permit from the EPA not to run a cat converter.

34. Tell everyone at the drags that your running 32psi, and after the Cortina sucks your headlights out , say " oh my digital boost controller was stuck on 11psi "

35. glu-tac your TURBO Badge on to your boot so when you floor it, the TURBO Badge will fall off and you will say, Bro! See that my car is fast the turbo badge falls off all the time!

36. always wash your car with the hood up on the nature strip

37. When out with mates, make sure your fat cousin and her boyfriend sit in the back so your car looks lower.

38. when someone overtakes u in ur vl u have to reovertake them and just as u pass them u have to make sure the blow off valve sounds

39. When driving past chicks at o-zone, make sure you change gears at just the right time for the BOV to open up...

correct cruising method : hand out window on the door, 1 hand on top of steering wheel, chin up, hat tickling gods feet, full shick diesel jeans and top

[Yarisboy]

lol, it's scary how much of that I see in my little town

[dave5282]

lol, it's scary how much of that I see in my little town

Ditto

[ShinmaTsunami]

Ok.... I don't know about you.... But, what's a vl? Remember, I live in the states and the lexicon is different.

:arrgg-matey:

[-baker-]

a VL is a holden car or GMH Mostly In australia you see italian (wogs) people driving them and chapple street in in melbourne cbd where there are lits of italians

[illuminati]

thats not right.

its not only intalians. there are lebs, greeks, turks, any nationality. i even seen ozzies riding around in cameiloin vls with **** stickers all over them, and a blown turbo thinking its fast.

the term i giv to these ppl is RE. ("shick RE" is what the always say)

u cant say that all or only intalians are REs, theres a couple from each notionality. there are also italians that are not REs. that goes for all natioanlitys.

personaly i HATE REs. they are too stupid.

[-baker-]

what ever ! a Wog Is A WOG And A VL IS A VL