If Scientists Wrote Nursery Rhymes

[Raistlin]

How many can you solve? (Answers below)

1. A research team proceeded toward the apex of a natural geologic

protuberance, the purpose of their expedition being the procurement of

a sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact size

of which was unspecified. One member of the team precipitantly descended,

sustaining severe fractural damage to the upper cranial portion of his

anatomical structure. Subsequently, the second member of the team

performed a self-rotational translation oriented in the direction taken

by the first member.

2. Complications arose during an investigation of dietary influence: one

researcher was unable to assimilate adipose tissue and another was unable

to consume tissue consisting chiefly of muscle fiber. By reciprocal

arrangement between the two researchers, total consumption of the viands

under consideration was achieved, this leaving the original container of

the viands devoid of contents.

3. A young male human was situated near the intersection of two supporting

structural elements at right angles to each other: said subject was involved

in ingesting a saccharine composition prepared in conjunction with the ritual

observance of an annual fixed-day religious festival. Insertion into the

saccharine composition of the opposable digit of his forelimb was followed

by removal of a drupe of genus prune. Subsequently the subject made a

declarative statement regarding the high quality of his character as a

young male human.

4. A triumvirate of murine rodents totally deviod of ophthalmic acuity

were observed in a state of rapid locomotion in pursuit of an

agriculturalist's marital adjunct. Said adjunct then performed triple

caudectomy utilizing an acutely honed bladed instrument generally used

for the subdivision of edible tissue.

5. A female of the species homo sapiens was the possesor of a small

immature ruminant of the genus ovis, the outer most covering of which

reflected all wavelengths of visible light with a luminosity equal to

that mass of naturally occurring microscopically crystalline water.

Regardless of the translational pathway chosen by the homo sapien, the

probability was 1 that the forementioned ruminent would select the same

pathway.

6. A human female, extremely captious and given to opposed behavior, was

questioned as to the dynamic state of her cultivated tract of land used

for production of various types of flora. The tract components were

enumerated as argentous tone-producing agents, a rare species of oceaninc

growth and pulchritudinous young females situated in a linear orientation.

1. jack and Jill went up the hill

To fetch a pail of water.

jack fell down and broke his crown,

And Jill came tumbling after.

2. jack Sprat could eat no fat.

His wife could eat no lean.

And so.......(I don't remember the words)

They ate the platter clean.

3. Little Jack Horner

Sat in the corner

Eating his Christmas pie

He stuck in his thumb

And pulled out a plum

And said "What a good boy am I!"

4. Three blind mice, three blind mice

See how they run, see how they run.

They all ran after the farmer's wife

Who cut off their tails with a carving knife

Did you ever see such a sight in your life

As three blind mice.

5. Mary had a Little Lamb

Whose fleece was white as snow.

And everywhere that Mary went,

The lamb was sure to go.

6. Mary, Mary, quite contrary,

How does your garden grow.

With silver bells, and cockle shells

And pretty maidens, all in a row.

[Bizarra]

Cheated on the 1st :(

Then when I saw where you were coming from, the rest were easy peasy

[Mike0001]

Sounds more like business jargon than science to me!

[Raistlin]

Sounds more like business jargon than science to me!

What business are you in... :P