Bit Of Fun :) Email I Was Sent

[Pat2u]

This was written by a guy...it's pretty damn smart.

Girls -- Please have a sense of humor!

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed . Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear....

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfit s. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having s*x tonight either....but at least that girl knows I'm smarter than her.

[Bizarra]

Excellent

It is seldom that the men win

[Phoenix999]

Where my wife is concerned I just tell her.... if she wants to have any new clothes or shoes etc. then she buys them herself with her own money

She works so she pays for it

As for any other areas of life I'll keep my mouth shut :shutit:

[KPARRIS-JONES]

Hah brilliant!

To avoid girls, I got a car. But that has just led to the destruction of any form of a social life. And being a teenager, it was never all that anyway.

BUT, I live by a philosophy that a very wise man once told me;

'Mate, if it's got t*ts or tyres, It'll cost you money.'

Seeing as all my cash is spent on my tyres, I'll have to hope that when the GTi's complete, It'll attract the t*ts!

This is contradictory to whatI said on line 2, but I have learnt that during these years of my life, women are no good. ;)

[Phoenix999]

Hah brilliant!

To avoid girls, I got a car. But that has just led to the destruction of any form of a social life. And being a teenager, it was never all that anyway.

BUT, I live by a philosophy that a very wise man once told me;

'Mate, if it's got t*ts or tyres, It'll cost you money.'

Seeing as all my cash is spent on my tyres, I'll have to hope that when the GTi's complete, It'll attract the t*ts!

This is contradictory to whatI said on line 2, but I have learnt that during these years of my life, women are no good. ;)

You are young and you will find out that women are good for some things

But when you get much older you will then start to wonder what they are good for ;)

[Bizarra]

Hah brilliant!

To avoid girls, I got a car. But that has just led to the destruction of any form of a social life. And being a teenager, it was never all that anyway.

BUT, I live by a philosophy that a very wise man once told me;

'Mate, if it's got t*ts or tyres, It'll cost you money.'

Seeing as all my cash is spent on my tyres, I'll have to hope that when the GTi's complete, It'll attract the t*ts!

This is contradictory to whatI said on line 2, but I have learnt that during these years of my life, women are no good. ;)

You are young and you will find out that women are good for some things

But when you get much older you will then start to wonder what they are good for ;)

Steve, my friend, let me give you a piece of good advice, because you are a nice guy :D

Go and buy a one way ticket to Timbuctoo, don't wait to pack anything, just do it now :o GO! GO! GO!

There will be a stampede of TOC Ladies after your blood, & I can't stand the sight of blood or violence :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

[Phoenix999]

Vic.... I'n not scared.... no way :help2:

[KPARRIS-JONES]

:lol:

I am well aware of the good points about women right now, but at the current time, I have my mind focussed on more important things. Such as painting the interior trim and fitting the pedals with some industrial strength black-bonder. I stuck a screwdriver to a rag with it and I can tell that it will NEVER come off....... :o

It is very good having a car at 14 though, if I want a girl to think I'mm cool, all I have to do is mention that I have a car. And if I want a girl to go away for whatever reason, all I have to do is start talking about the engine and what I plan to do with it! :lol2:

[Red Yaris 54]

:lol:

I am well aware of the good points about women right now, but at the current time, I have my mind focussed on more important things. Such as painting the interior trim and fitting the pedals with some industrial strength black-bonder. I stuck a screwdriver to a rag with it and I can tell that it will NEVER come off....... :o

It is very good having a car at 14 though, if I want a girl to think I'mm cool, all I have to do is mention that I have a car. And if I want a girl to go away for whatever reason, all I have to do is start talking about the engine and what I plan to do with it! :lol2:

I wish that I had known then (at 14) what I know about women now...................You have much to learn young man :P ;)

It is fun learning :lol2:

[Bizarra]

:lol:

I am well aware of the good points about women right now, but at the current time, I have my mind focussed on more important things. Such as painting the interior trim and fitting the pedals with some industrial strength black-bonder. I stuck a screwdriver to a rag with it and I can tell that it will NEVER come off....... :o

It is very good having a car at 14 though, if I want a girl to think I'mm cool, all I have to do is mention that I have a car. And if I want a girl to go away for whatever reason, all I have to do is start talking about the engine and what I plan to do with it! :lol2:

I wish that I had known then (at 14) what I know about women now...................You have much to learn young man :P ;)

It is fun learning :lol2:

Truer words were never spoken

[KPARRIS-JONES]

:lol:

I am well aware of the good points about women right now, but at the current time, I have my mind focussed on more important things. Such as painting the interior trim and fitting the pedals with some industrial strength black-bonder. I stuck a screwdriver to a rag with it and I can tell that it will NEVER come off....... :o

It is very good having a car at 14 though, if I want a girl to think I'mm cool, all I have to do is mention that I have a car. And if I want a girl to go away for whatever reason, all I have to do is start talking about the engine and what I plan to do with it! :lol2:

I wish that I had known then (at 14) what I know about women now...................You have much to learn young man :P ;)

It is fun learning :lol2:

I don't doubt that, but the things that I have learnt already just remind me more and more why I should stick with working on fluffy.........girls are soooooo confusing. :wacko: :P

[Phoenix999]

.... I should stick with working on fluffy....

Where women are concerned we have been working on that for years ;)